அனைவரும் நுழையலாம்

Treasure I found to cherish for my entire life - part 2

2009-08-27T16:54:00.003-05:00

After landing at the Frankfurt airport we started to move towards our transit. We had the next flight to Chicago. My husband was of the assumption that we had a long waiting time of 5 hrs in the transit. Thanks to me I never had a look at the itinerary even after enquiry about my travel from many persons. So no worries about the stay and other stuffs. Being first time traveler, you may enjoy everything but I bet this waiting [when you are alone] is really a boring stuff.

He was a bit relaxed till we came across the departure chart. It was a surprise for him that we just had 2 hours of waiting time. [Can I call it surprise or tensed?!?!?! I was not really able to make it] We wandered to find where our gate was. Imagine we just circled around the same place twice to find the gate. I just wanted to ask him if I ,of the two, were the only person to travel abroad for the first time!

Finally after a 15 minutes of search he got to know where exactly we must move. The airport was huge and I was enjoying the view of the same. Different outlets for variety of food! After reaching the terminal my hubby drained off the happy feelings pounding inside me by warning about the questions I may be asked when I have to cross the security check. It was worse than a visa interview and I was back to my normal self just expecting the queue before me to get longer instead of shorter! As the queue moved further, me and my hubby got separated in different lines.

It was most humiliating security check I ever had! We were asked to remove our shoes, socks, jackets, empty our pockets including the ornaments we had. I was not very much sure to remove my mangal sutra and was determined to fight if I am asked to! [Don't ask me now, the current situation is I don't really bother to wear it all time! This event took place just within a month of marriage when you are with fresh memories!] Unknowingly I did not get off my belt and hence rang the alarm when I had passed through. I was asked to stand aside and was half expecting to be checked in a closed space. To my surprise I was checked in open air and I felt highly humiliated when the security personal had raised my tops off exposing my waist a bit. I offered to help by holding my dress and also trying to explain that it should have been the belt. All I got in response was a tone of authority to keep my hands up and do nothing.

It was true that there weren't anyone around bothered or looking at us but still it indeed affected me. Its was a sudden blow to realize the different culture and perceptions. Only happy part of all this was it was a lady security guard and not a male who was examining me. Atleast this basic manners is maintained here. "Ladies to be checked by a lady security personnel"

Now having had this encounter, I collected my baggage and was waiting for my hubby to join me as I had no intention to go near the two security officials, whose questioner I had to face and succeed to pass through the gate which would lead me to my terminal, sitting across from me. The officials seeing me standing at a distance gestured me towards them. Having had no better option I strolled towards them as slow as possible hoping every second for my hubby to catch up with me. Upon reaching them I handed over my boarding pass and my passport. On seeing my visa details one of them exclaimed "Are you from India" and another asked me from where in India. I just told from chennai. Both of them were excited and just asked me why am I going to US. I told I got married and traveling with my hubby when my hubby just joined me. One of the official told "Vannakam" [a greeting in Tamil language though it indeed sounded strangely] when other told "I love inida, I love chennai" and just asked me to have a great stay in US

It was all over within just seconds. Even my hubby dint believe that it went on so well. We greeted both of them and carried on. In the airport my hubby insisted me to purchase water and gave a $10 bill. That was the first time I am seeing a dollar bill. I knew nothing about the money value system in US. I went and asked for a bottle in shop and the lady told me or that was what I was able to make it out from what ever she told "I dont have proper change can I give you in euros". I just shook my head. For me neither dollar nor euro dint make a difference as I had no idea of both the value system. Only concern was what my husband would comment when I go back with change and what if it was not correct and with euros which I wasnt very sure would of help to him in US. To my relief when I returned with change and told I dont know anything about this calculation he simply replied saying even he is not so sure of euros so not an issue.

Thus we had come to wait in the terminal for our next flight to Chicago, MY ENTRY INTO US SOIL!

Attitude and view changes one's perspective

2009-08-21T09:19:00.000-05:00

So now I know how I can keep posting new ones in my blog.. The secret is "Watch movies" ha ha ha ha ha .. I eventually feel my blog site is going to become movie reviews..

I cant really resist myself from writing this today. Thanks to one of my friend who read 2 earlier posts of mine and sent a link where I can watch movies online. Now that is what I say friends are for. I tend to get drifted away from what I wish to write. Let me focus.

My caption for this posts says it all. After the movie "Everybody's doing it" I dint really fell my comfort level in watching English movies have improved. But today I have found which type of movie do attract me. Thanks to the way movies has been classified here. My attitude towards English pictures have taken a new shape!

I believe the one and only constant thing in this world is "CHANGE". [I tend to repeat this again and again! Please bear with me!] One should be with open mind to accept and admit the same. Its more easier said than done. As the time moves on we tend to understand this more. My experience with this simple concept of watching English movies was the same. I never liked Western movies. The moment I see the scenes with such backdrops in star movies [sometimes I do browse through that channel for cartoon movies back in India] , I switch over. I felt those movies with cowboys and rifles involve more of violence.

Many times less knowledge is a bliss. Unknowingly I hit upon this movie "Love Takes Wings" released in April 2009. It turned out to be a wonderful movie. Hats off to the director. Every one had done justice to their character. The little girl at the orphanage had performed well. She has expressed the roughness towards the society which had abandon many kids like her and also tenderness when it comes to serving the kids down with illness.

Story short and sweet! It revolves around a young doctor [Sarah Jones] who arrives at a small town Sikeston as a physician. The town is affected by a unknown epidemic and she is put under the pressure to solve[?!?!] rather find the cause and treat for the same.

The movie's time period is when Liberty of women was under question. The villagers were not able to accept Sarah even as a nurse. Those were times when only male can become a doctor. The way she is humiliated and how she makes them believe her as a doctor is well depicted.

Being a lover of medicine and always wanting to peruse a career in it I personally felt this movie close to my heart. Though it was a simple dysentery, I was not able to believe how it would have been to treat the same before the discovery of a proper medicine. This movie gave me a visual treat to all those data my school books referred to. Thanks to all those who had contributed their time and life for all those modern day medicine which has helped us anticipate and a cure to keep us live longer!

I loved to watch the way Sarah prepared the saline bottles, tubes, saline mixture, intravenous injections with all those available stuffs like wood, rubber etc.! Gosh I am not sure if I was born then, before this birth, but it was really exciting to see medication done on those days!

Reason behind the spread of water-born disease [as called now] in the movie was a unused well which was being used for dumping! On discovering the same the water connection from the well was closed and hence the spread of disease was controlled.

Seeing this it just struck me that even on those days when there was no knowledge of disease people were open for implementing the remedy measures and play safe when enlightened about the cause. Now with the advent of good and high cost medication we are not ready for any control measures. Is medicine a boon or curse? With more knowledge and ways to control we never bother about the sanitation in our surroundings. All we care for is our home or office or place of our regular visit. From world sanitation its just personal sanitation we have now.

Whenever I see koovam [A river that flows around chennai] I feel bad that we had really worked hard to change a river to a proper gutter! Having had a river in hand, and spoiling it properly with all means, we now expect neighboring states to lend us with water!

I know I am getting too much sentimental..I have to stop! Just writing and shouting wont help to improve situation. Every individual should think twice before dropping a garbage in public places! This could be pretty good start to keep the world clean!

Sequel to post of my friend named "Possibilities"

2009-06-18T09:28:00.008-05:00

A new concept is it? Frankly I don't know if this is new. I read a post in my friends deepti's blog and deeply felt I have to reply her and add points to her's. I first felt to leave it as comment but it turned out to be very long..Hence decided to post it in my blog.

So here is the link for her post and you have two options either to go ahead read that and come back or read further ahead.

http://deescovering.blogspot.com/2009/06/possibilities.html

For readers who were not able to go through the link...here is the gist. Its about the fading dreams and dreams that one is forced to bury due to various constraints. Its about an once independent women who suddenly realize that she is completely dependent on someone.

Now read on my share of the same....

Now coming to her post even I had to face the same situation. I am crazy about bikes not only as a pillion rider but even as a rider. I had always told to myself that with my dream boy I would love to go around different places in bikes. Even before my marriage I found that my hubby does know how to ride a bike but never wants to do one. After marriage at an instance I had to ride him to my brothers place in my bike with him in the pillion, and he was not even ready to hold on to my waist. But is this an vital thing to be given importance? I don't think so. One can think that the dream is now put into gutters but how can your dreams involve others? When I dream of going around in bikes I had imposed that in my future husband. And when now I find that is not possible who is really to be blamed?

I happen to see a video of Mrs.Dolly Parton giving commencement address in University of Tennessee. For those who are new to this name [like me :) ] , she is a famous singer. She has contributed a lot for education of kids through her Dollywood foundation with a simple motto 'Dream more, Learn more, Care more and Be more". But fact is she is more famous for her boobs and her dressing. When my husband showed me the link my first thought was what could she possibly speak about for such an audience. But it was really good. She walked through her life and explained in simple terms what she faced. She gave the differentiation between wishes and dreams. There could be many wishes one may have. They wither away as the time progresses on. They are hopes that we believe would come true. But dreams are something which we chase for. No matter what ever is the current state or position of us they don't wither away and lie back in our minds and kindles us deep within. Its like a fire in oneself. This is indeed true. Her speech was inspiring. I liked it more as it was in plain English with no buzz words.

Here goes the link. A must to watch...[Courtesy You tube]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EuOm2lLIOoU

As my friend has correctly mentioned I felt dependency is frustrating for me even. But I really wished to analyze the same. What we exactly think and feel as dependency? Is it merely because we are in H4? [H4 is a visa status for spouse of those working in US with H1 visa]

When my sister refused to be in H4 I kinda thought what is wrong with her. I felt it was an attitude problem of some kind which makes her refuse the same. Now I know what is the real funda behind it. I was sick of being dependent on someone for everything. I feel I am thinking 10 times before even ask for my husband to spend a dollar for something which I want. I felt relieved when I had ample amount of sanitary napkins which I got from India so that I need not ask the same to my husband.

When I had seen the kitchen I felt there wasn't good and proper vessels for me to proceed and asked the same to my hubby. He simply told it was with what he and his sister had been cooking from last 4 years. That was it. After that I dint feel like asking him for any utensils or cookware. There were many such instances. I don't use room-heaters unless it is unbearable for me to stand the cold. Thanks to the advent of summer I no longer have this problem. I went without breakfast for many days. This would just keep going on...

But when I stop and look back and give a re-think is it really my husband's fault in this? I feel this is my attitude problem. I don't deny there is indeed my husbands hands in this but what is the proportionality? Truth is his marital status has changed but not the financial status. What he was doing till now as a single person had to be same for two persons now. So I wont blame him in any way. So what is my problem?

Dependency is something everyone had had in their life and even have in their life. In short an Independent dependency is all we got. Every individual needs another soul and no one can live alone. So what is In dependency?

When we were kid we were dependent on our parents. We got everything from them and asked what was required to them. This had been there till we found ourselves in a job. That was till 23 years for me. I had no hesitation to ask or say what was in my mind till then. Even my parents have rejected to many proposals or wishes I had expressed to them. When my father restricted me in going to theaters I dint get hurt. I fought with him for the same and even though I lost, I was happy that I fought.

After joining job I still had to ask permission or at least get suggestion from my parents before taking any great leap. I was happy to do that. I felt I had to share it or inform the same to them before doing anything. So was I really independent or dependent then??

Now its just the person has been changed. Its now my husband and not father. But I fell depressed and rejected and dependent. Its that true? The truth is I am not ready to accept the fact. Even a single 'No' from my husband I feel I am deprived of my rights. I feel the insecurity in me which makes me feel I am being neglected. There could be a good explanation from his side for refusing the same. But I am not ready to listen to it with open mind. My entire thoughts are covered with a mask that "He is treating me so as he feels I am dependent on him and try to dominate me".

In fact he got me a web camera just to chat with my parents [He hardly uses it as he does not like to do web chat]. Its cost was 80$. Even knowing this still I feel bad to ask him to even go out. I am alone most of the time at home. When my husband is back from office I want him to just talk with me and spend time with me. My husband is a voracious reader. After I have come in here to live with him I hardly see him to read those books. I felt bad but if he starts to read I feel I am left alone and he is not spending time with me. Does that not look stupid? If I am able to really put this off from my mind I would be able to accept graciously even a bigger "NO" from my husband.

Another fact in US is you don't have the freedom to go out. You want your husband even to get to the nearest store. This kind of make me imprisoned inside the home. For first few weeks I felt I am under 'house arrest' like all top leaders are done back in India. Even to throw the garbage out I go only when my husband is there. I dint know how to lock my home properly till last month. Indeed there was no need for that either.

Thanks to my accident. This has really helped to go out without anyone's help. I walk to the physiotherapy center alternative days. My gym is in the same location but still I never used to go there alone without my hubby. So its the need which made me go. And I no longer feel I am in house arrest. So its my change in the attitude which had made me feel I am free when I had really been always free..

In a recent book I had read the author explains about "Freedom". It is not merely do things which you like to do but to understand the concept of dependence. I strongly feel if we are able to define and explain ourselves what is "Dependence" we can get out of that sack which binds us and blinds us from proper vision.

Change is the only constant thing in this world. This is something which I believe and have seen through in my life. I am trying to inbuilt the same in me to understand the life and lead it in most successful way.

Think it has become a lengthier post... No problem as because of this I was able to do a self analysis even. My husband always says I am an extrovert and hence a loud thinker. I cant think if I don't speak. This is true with every post of mine. I never think before I write and as I write my flow goes on. So people like me cant avoid the post getting lengthier and can analysis oneself as they speak/write...

:)

Thanks for the patience in reading this in full!!!

Picture Tag

2009-06-16T21:13:00.009-05:00

I was browsing across my google reader and got to read the posts of Mrs.Inbavali in her site Inba's corner.

I thought I would also take up this tag.

The rule is - I'm supposed to paste an image for every answer of mine which get from the first page of google image search, with minimal explanation.So, here are mine....

1. The age you will be in your next birthday: 28

2. A place you’d like to travel to: Kulu Manali

3. Your Favourite place: Terrace at my home along with my cat

4. Your favourite food/drink: Idili upma

5. Your favourite pet: cat [This just looks like my Ammu, my cat]

6. Your favourite colour combination: blue and white strips [I simply love it that way!]

7. Your favourite piece of clothing: saree blue color

8. Your all time favourite song: kalyana thennila [yesudas-chitra.Iit is my ever-loving song]

9. Your favourite TV show: Neeya nana and Super singer [Courtesy: Vijay TV]

10. Full name of your significant other: Radhakrishnan [Least expected I would get this picture]

11. The town in which you live in: Birmingham, Alabama

12. Your screen name/nickname: Thithi [I never expected to get any results for this but was
surprised to see a SUB on my name..Hurrah!]

13. Your first job: Programmer

14. Your Dream Job: Teacher [I knew well I am fit for this job and wont become one as I dont wish being commented by my students]

15: Bad Habit you have: Short tempered

16. Your worst fear: Death of my loved ones

17. The one thing you’ll like to do before you die: Adopt a girl child

18. The first thing you’ll buy if you get $1,000,000: Start a home for orphans

You can also take up this tag and see what comes in for you. I really liked this as few of the search did surprised me and few made me feel I got what I wanted for..

Nice one.

ஓல்ட் இஸ் கோல்ட்!

2009-06-04T10:00:00.004-05:00

அப்பாடா! தமிழ்-ல ஒரு பதிவு போடுறேன் ரொம்ப நாளைக்கு பிறகு!!!!
சில-பல பேருக்கு சந்தோஷமா இருந்தாலும் தப்பு நிறைய இருக்க வாய்ப்பு இருக்கு. பொது மன்னிப்பு மொதல்லையே கேட்கறேன்!

எனக்கு பாட்டு கேட்கறது, பாடறது இரண்டுமே ரொம்ப பிடிக்கும். [பாவம் கேட்கறவங்க தான்....!!! அரசியலில் இதெல்லாம் சாதாரணமப்பா! ]. அபூர்வ ராகங்கள் படத்தில ஒரு பாட்டு கேட்டன்! சூப்பர்! நல்ல அர்த்தமுள்ள பாட்டு. ஹுஉம் இப்போவெல்லாம் பாட்டுல வரி இருக்கான்னு கண்டுபிடிக்க வேண்டி இருக்கு! என்ன பண்றது!

பாட்டோட வரிகள் தேடினேன். கூகிள் கைகொடுக்கல! அதனால என்ன நாமே பதிச்சிடலம்னு தோணிச்சு! [அவ்வளவு வெட்டியா இருக்கேன்!] அதான் உடனே [ஹி ஹி யூடுப்-ல பாட்ட கேட்டு/பார்த்து வரிகள் எழுதிட்டேன் ஆனா பதிவு போடத்தான் லேட் ஆகிடுச்சு!!!] போட்டுட்டேன்! இதோ அதன் வரிகள். வரிகளின் அர்த்தத்தை உணர்க!

மூணாவது சரணம் எனக்கு ரொம்ப பிடிச்சு போச்சு

பல்லவி
ஏழு ஸ்வரங்களுக்குள் எத்தனை பாடல்
இதய சுரங்கத்துள் எத்தனை கேள்வி
காணும் மனிதருக்குள் எத்தனை சலனம்
வெறும் கற்பனை சந்தோஷத்தில் அவனது கவனம்

சரணம்

காலை எழுந்தவுடன் நாளைய கேள்வி - அது
கையில் கிடைத்த பின்னும் துடிக்குது ஆவி
ஏன் என்ற கேள்வி ஒன்று என்றைக்கும் தங்கும் - மனிதன்
இன்ப துன்பம் எதிலும் கேள்வி தான் மிஞ்சும்
(ஏழு ஸ்வரங்களுக்குள் எத்தனை பாடல்.....)

சரணம்

எனக்காக நீ அழுதல் இயற்கையில் நடக்கும் - நீ
எனக்காக உணவு உன்ன எப்படி நடக்கும்
நமக்கென்று பூமியிலே கடமைகள் உண்டு - அதை
நமக்காக நம் கையால் செய்வது நன்று
(ஏழு ஸ்வரங்களுக்குள் எத்தனை பாடல்....)

சரணம்

ஆரம்பத்தில் பிறப்பும் உன் கையில் இல்லை - என்றும்
அடுத்தடுத்து நடக்கும் உன் கையில் இல்லை
பாதை வகுத்த பின்பு பயந்து என்ன லாபம் - அதில்
பயணம் நடத்தி விடு மறைந்திடும் பாவம்
(ஏழு ஸ்வரங்களுக்குள் எத்தனை பாடல்....)
சரணம்

நாளை பொழுது என்றும் நமக்கென வாழ்க - அதை
நடத்த ஒருவன் உண்டு கோவிலில் காண்க
வேளை பிறக்கும் என்று நம்பிக்கை கொள்க - எந்த
வேதனையும் மாறும் மேகத்தை போல
(ஏழு ஸ்வரங்களுக்குள் எத்தனை பாடல்...)

ஏதோ என்னால் முடிந்தது!

பி.கு :
மெய் தந்தவர் [இசை] : விஸ்வநாதன்
உயிர் தந்தவர் [பாடலாசிரியர்] : கண்ணதாசன் []
உயிர்மெய்யாய் உலகுக்கு தந்தவர் [பாடியவர்] : வாணி ஜெயராம். அவங்களுக்கு அவார்டு வாங்கி தந்த பாட்டு.

Everybody's Doing It

2009-05-08T17:47:00.005-05:00

Nice caption isn't it? I dint frame it hence its good! ha ha ha ha

To start with this is not a movie review.....

The title refers to a movie released in 2002 written by James LaRosa and directed by Jeff Beesley which I accidentally happen to see today. Thanks to You tube movies..

I don't watch much of English movies for the simple fact that I won't be able to follow it well dialogue through dialogue and frankly I was afraid it may have scenes which I am not comfortable to look at. And that made me watch just animated cartoon movies as I have a fascination for comic characters.

My life here in USA paved way to watch English movies. In the theaters we don't have much of choice and I have seen 2 movies [10.30pm shows] with my hubby. The first ever one turned to be worst and the second was a kind of okay.

Today I accidentally stepped upon the movies feature of the you tube [Till date I was just watching those movies posted as parts]. Randomly I picked this picture as the title indeed attracted me. Happy that it did turn out to be a good one. The plot was simple and clean and what we come across in day to day life.

Its about peer pressure in a high school to pledge against premarital sex. Pretty challenging plot isn't it. The director has indeed handled it well. The story revolves around the announcement from Government to take steps to avoid or reduce premarital sex among kids in every school. The school with 100% success rate in eradicating is awarded with funds.

This puts the pressure on the school to enforce the same on the kids. But the approach taken for this is where the school goes wrong. Instead of teaching the kids about the necessity of safe sex and the needs for healthier relationships, they try to enforce/ scare the kids with the consequences of premarital sex. They introduce a pledge system where the kids have to swore to be virgins and by doing this they get lot of benefits inclusive of scholarships! Under the leadership of a student [Caroline enacted by Brooke D'Orsay] they spy other students.

Though kids accept to the sign up the pledge for the attractive offers they are unable to keep up the promise. More the rules are enforced, more the kids tend to rebel. Angela, One among the kids doesn't wish to take the pledge just for the sake of it. She is exposed to the pressure from her peers as her sign would make it 100% and the school would get the funding. This disturbs her a lot as she is not able to accept the fact that sex is totally unhealthy and the real facts are being not put to the students. In spite of the fact she had a boyfriend and she being virgin, she strongly believed that one should realize inside them not to have intercourse and just not because of fear.

Finally the story ends with other students, parents and teachers understanding the fact that pressurizing doesn't lead to solutions and school management decides to introduce kids with the use of contraception and other safety methods along with the health science subject and aid for proper sex education.

Hey wait.. I already told to myself it isn't a review.. Okay I better stop here and go to what I wished to convey [I can hear people say "Oh God the post hasn't begin yet?" ]

I saw this in a more general perspective. This peer pressure is there every where. We name it society and tend to live in a way to please others rather than living for oneself. There was an instance in my home. My sister after her return from US, was commented on her dressing sense . I did accept that "when in Rome do as Romans do".. but what about your wishes. I heard most say "Just listen to the heart and proceed".. How could we really do when we constantly think to please others than trying to live for ourselves..

This is just a simple instance which I quoted. There are lot many. In most of the conferences you can see the dress code is suits for men. In western countries the costume helps in fighting against their climatic conditions. But why to do it back in India, in Chennai at peak summer. Doesn't it sound crazy?

About love or inter-caste marriages. Most of the opposition comes from the parents because of the fear that they can't face their social contacts or family members. The are forced not to realize their kids dreams even though they knew about it. I am not supporting inter-caste marriages/love marriages. Neither do I have belief in them. But this movie did indeed made me feel that its that society or peer makes the parents not to see the prospects with an open mind. I have been a witness for few of love marriages and also failures due to parents opposition. Very few cases had I got a chance to hear from a dad/mom proper reason for their non-cooperative moment. Most of them where "How do I face this world" as if the entire world is just looking at them. One even went to the extent of saying.. "If their daughter don't comply they have to leave to another town or place where no one would knew them".

Why were are unable to avoid this peer pressure. Rather how to fore go it? Good question but I haven't got a great answer to this yet. What is society? Ultimately its we, our self.. Then what could be stopping us? As the girl "Angela" in the movie its we who has to overcome this. Rome wasn't built in a day.. so I knew its not a simple and quick change to get its effect.. But I do hope in coming generation it could change..

Hoping for the best. Anyone with a good suggestion are welcome!!!

Review!?!?!?!?!

2009-05-08T15:53:00.003-05:00

Here I am back again with another post. I have been thinking to write a post for past two days but somehow I dint. But this is not the topic on which I wished to write. Sounds funny isn't. People write posts when they want to write about something. I write posts because I wished to write something rather than writing about something.. sounds crazy to me too...

Having become a house wife/home maker [what ever it may be called .. for me it seems like a vacation after many years he he he he] suddenly I really dint know what to do to kill time. I had been busy all through out the time in my life and this seems a new world. Now "how do you keep yourself occupied" is the most common question I am posted with. Thought I better review myself and get an answer to this..

What I do:

1. Of course do house hold chores...[cooking, laundry, cleaning....]

2. Mostly I do chatting with someone whom I find

3. watch movies [in you tube.. thanks to them else I would have been mad by now!]

4. TV shows online. [ I am constantly following airtel super singer by vijay Tv]

5. Orkut 24/7

6. Read articles..[both online and books from the small library maintained by my hubby]

7. Most important Video chat with my parents and in-laws....

Now what we have got here.. It seems most of them circle around a simple box. Its none other than the "PC/ Laptop". I cant imagine a day when this small box fails to open....

Computer and Internet had been the least priority of my life..[PS: for those who do not know me.. I was an software engineer all through out my career .. not a long one just 3 years] I hate to sit before PC/internet when I am off from my work environment. Even as a blogger I never spent much time with computers..

But now it is my life.

Thanks to Internet. Never in my life have I felt too close to Web World. My dad makes fun of me for being in Internet all through out the day. Even I fell bad some times for being idle before this box. But I really don't know how to keep me occupied.

I like reading.. That could be the next option I have.. Even I have tried them..

But my motive behind writing this blog was not to say I feel bad for what I am doing now. I am happy for having been introduced to this web world. I learnt many new things which I haven't even given a thought about. Last year if someone would have told me to just browse something I would have told them to go to hell.

Even for technical needs I was not using much of internet. When it becomes mandatory to surf I just call my friend [who is crazy about surfing] about the topic I require information. He just turns to me with necessary list of links from which I narrow down to what I want. Sounds like outsourcing isn't it?? Cool I did them all through out. I never have seen any video in you tube nor used twitter. The only thing worth to mention was I used to hear online songs..

It is turn of events now!

Everything new would fascinate oneself. But I wont rate this as a fascination. I feel this web world is also good. It just our utilization and handling methods would reflect the effect of it on us. This is true for everything. The world has nothing good or bad. Its just our exposure and our attitude and perception about them makes it bad or good.

The video chat with my family has really helped me a lot. Never had I felt I am very far away from my home land at different time zones. Without this I would have gone crazy.

So now that doesn't mean web world is purely full of advantageous. There are also few pranks in the form of mails or offline messages I get. All what I wanted to say was anything should be used to improve oneself towards success and not to affect others feelings!..

Now stop.. where I am leading to.. I dint intend to write anything to teach or to preach.. This was supposed to be a post to review myself...

All what I was able to infer was... hate and love are fictitious. The thing in which I had the most feeling of hatred has become my only companion and eyes to the outside world. I better start seeing things with impartial and open mind to get the best of it.

Most of my posts are for light reading.. I don't think I can count this to that herd!!! New aspirations.. I hope its a good start!

Trek experiences III - Skandagiri

2009-03-18T14:10:00.005-05:00

Here I go again with another trek experience. This was my second moon light trek. First one, ofcource was more thrilling, as I wasn't aware what was in store for me. Now do not ask me where is the first one.. I would definitely share that with you all in my upcoming posts.

This time, I was a sort of leading the group [don't raise eyebrows..it was just a group of 6 people] and I was the one who had moon light trek experience. [he he he time to raise my collar huh!]

PS: Don't try to ask feedback from other members about my leadership. Negative[Real] comments are never accepted.

Jokes apart. This trek was a memorable one for many reasons:

1. It happened when I was in Bangalore.

2. I had initiated and taken full arrangements of the trek.

3. I was accompanied by my best friends. [Usually I join some other group and try to get accustomed to people and gain friends..Here I went with almost everyone I knew well]

4. Mode of transportation was BIKE. [I am little crazy about bikes: just little??? screams from my friends]

5. No one including me, who was trying to guide the group, knows anything about the route or the place we where trying to trek!

6.............

Think this would go on and on and on and I wont write any thing interesting....[So till now was it interesting??? Nice question but I cant comment on myself!]

About Skandagiri: Courtesy: From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Skandagiri
"Skandagiri is a hill, located approximately 70km from Bangalore city in the Indian state of Karnataka. It is off Bellary Road (NH-7 Hyderabad-Bangalore Highway), and is very close to Nandi Hills and Chikkaballapura. The peak is at an altitude of about 1350 meters, it is every adventurer’s paradise with beautiful night trek, altitude camping, stunning sunrise, and serene and swimming clouds that sometimes limits visibility to just a few meters".

Thanks to Google and and its links. Its from here I managed to get good reviews about the place and also approach to the place. It was just 70kms from the place of our stay and hence we decided to go in bike [Rather I imposed on going in bike when everyone else was suggesting of taking a vehicle]

Note: Of total 7 people, I was the only girl and it was I who wanted a bike drive in the late night.

With all set for the lovely night, I had one of my friend pick me from my office and we dropped in at his home for dinner [Just two of us. We cooked :) ] and bought some last minute requirements like torch, medicines and other stuffs. Medical kit was my responsibility....

From his home we manged to reach the meeting point near Hebbal at around 9.30pm. We were 7 people with 4 bikes. I had insisted on having helmets for each and everyone. I managed to get one for myself from my colleague too [It was too big for me ;) so I never used it and stole muffler and scarf from my friends helping them freeze in cold!] Being a single girl among the group is lot more advantageous. I was really taken care by everyone! ;)

At Hebbal we had our dinner [This is for others....Believe me I dint have dinner again...Next day we don't know when we can have food!] We started our trek around 10.30pm from there. None of us knew the route. We [Rather I ] decided to take one of the 2 routes I managed to get from the site. I took a print out of the same.

The journey was not as simple as I had believed. Till Chikkabalapur it was NH. The highway was good and calm with few heavy vehicles crossing us at some intervals. We had a pleasant and peaceful journey. It was too cold and dark but still we enjoyed. I was with my brother and we sang all our favourite musical numbers. Both of us are great fans of Ilayaraja. Whoever crossed us would have to definitely turn back to have a look at us once more as we were literally shouting at the top of our voice. Never in my life had I dreamt of singing on road in middle of the night.

After reaching certain point where the map had directed us to take a left near to a statue, we felt we were lost. As it was 12.30 when we reached Chikkabalapur we dint have anyone to actually direct us the right path. We literally had to stop and do lot of retracing before getting to some place.

When we changed routes from the main road to off lanes it was too scary [I knew it was for me not sure about others]. Imagine there is silence and darkness around you and you have just your headlights and you travel to an unknown place in unknown path. Even the street lights weren't functional. I had to hold my brother tight in order to relax myself.

We somehow managed to get to place where we found 3 guys standing and talking on the road. I was too enthusiastic and offered to go and enquire them. When I got good stare from everyone was then I realized I was a girl and it was past midnight! Mostly I never felt I am a girl and hate to be constrained because of my gender. They suggested us to retrace the path and take a right. Gosh I never thought that road in the right could be so small. It was more like going inside a small street in at a village. With dogs barking around we went to a spot from where we cant drive anymore. Thus we concluded that either we took a wrong route or those guys were unaware of what we asked.

We decided to go back to the same guys to clarify the route [at least to fight with them for directing us in wrong path... he he Humans always are happy to point out other people's mistake...And even at that middle of night we wished to execute this typical behavior]. This time we thought not to waste petrol [its too much and often increases] and just 2 of us went ahead for enquiry leaving the rest in the middle of the road. We parked the bikes and all sat on the road. My brother even lied flat on the road to take a nap. It was a wonderful night but I wasn't even able to enjoy my favorite moon! What a trip with so much confusions..But to my surprise all others seemed to enjoy. They were even happy to return back home if they don't get clear further directions. They were shouting, making fun and dancing... somehow I dint get to their spree and let myself...[May be I am perfectionist and as the organizer I want the mission to be successful!?!?!?!?]

The two guys came back with a car and asked us to follow the car who would direct us in right path. Now this time we got the correct right which we missed last time and managed to take from there alone as the car went on in another direction. This was smooth until we realized that we are just traveling without any glimpse of target. We parked our vehicles again in a spot where we saw some houses at a distance with lights. One from our group, Srikanth walked past a narrow path which was not even proper for bike and managed to go to one of the houses. He got a guy [Sreedhar] who accepted to be our guide for reaching the mountain base and also to top of the mountain.. Hence by 1.30 we managed to get to the base of the hill. We parked our bikes and started our great journey ahead. From there on it was a wonderful journey. With all my tensions gone I was back to my normal playful girl.

The moon did her job and made our torches [we had around 7 of them] useless. The view of the city through out the path was too good. With few stops [to take rest and catch up breathe.. it was damn too cold man and cold winds just shaking our balance] we managed to reach the top by around 3 am and sighed with relief on the mission accomplished. They had rated the trek as moderate but the entire path was very steep and slippery with nothing near the path to hold and walk. It was like they had made small steps [could be man made but it seemed more to be like naturally created due to the human access to the place] in huge steep rocks.

Sreedhar commented every time we sat for some rest that most of people don't complete the trek as they feel tired in the way, especially if the group had girls. I felt bad and wanted to prove him that his bias on gender basis was not fair. I din't reply to his comment as reality struck me. I just wanted to make sure that there are exceptions too.

At the top there were many such groups. Thanks to God we were not the only crazy people on earth. Sreedhar left us from there saying he had to go back and try for another batch of peaple. Gosh he should really have a great practice to climb up and down the hill just like that. He was just 20 yrs and was still a student doing this part-time to bear his educational expenses. There are many like this around us who earn to live. My silent prayers to his successful life.

It turned out to be a very bad weather and we all were literally freezing in the cold breeze. Me with a sweater, one jerkins and a leather jacket [took from my brother], 2 scarfs [took from my friend] and a monkey cap [he he he I was still shivering and thinking what more can I steal from my co-trekkers.....]. Surprise to find even a shop at such a odd place and at odd timings. The shop was supplying tea and omelet [both of which I wont have :( I neither drink tea nor have egg]. Leaving me on one of the rocks the others went forward to have something hot.

Note:The shop keeper lives down the hill and this shop is functional only on weekends. He says in weekends he is really able make a good profit. [Why not with so many people coming over there and with monopoly he can definitely earn more].

He also sold raw materials for setting up born fire. It costs around Rs 70. I still wonder on what basis this amount was fixed. But for that moment it was a mandatory for us.The fire was really helpful. So the rest of the night passed on keeping the fire alive rather keeping ourselves alive. [we had to buy it twice for keeping it live through the night]

Around 6.30am we could see the sun showings its traces of trying to rise up. We also noticed that the number of persons to view the same had also increased. We should be around 150 people say... One group even manged to burst crackers and rockets as the sun started to rise. This was the moment we had expected for and taken such a great mission. It was too good. This place is supposed to be above cloud 9 [That is what it is referred as]. To our dismay there weren't much clouds due to heavy breeze. But was a blessing in disguise as it was really awesome to have moon in one horizon and sun on the other in a pretty clear sky.

We were there till 7.30 and decided to start walk back. The way back was not that way difficult and we managed to do it in an hour. This is when we saw the way in which we had waded through in the night without knowing what is there awaiting us. It was indeed a nice trek. Once down the hill we headed back to banglore with a heavy heart which was no more ready to carry our body...

Most memorable Gift ever

2009-03-09T16:49:00.003-05:00

Its always a great feeling when a song is dedicated for you by your loved one...

My hubby presented me the most precious and beautiful gift I can ever get in my life. I never knew there is an underlying poet in him till date. Was spell bound by his poem for me. It is such small things and events in life which takes you off board and makes you spellbound.

The poem was plain and simple yet wonderful. Sometimes simple things look beautiful.

I strongly felt I should post it in my blog. Here it goes........

Going on life's journey with you on my side
It has been a beautiful ride

You laughter and wonderful smile
And a heart that knows no guile

Has filled my world with a thousand lights
Accompanied with many sleepless nights!

Let us share our joys and sorrow
Learn together for a better tomorrow

The love that binds us now
May it last till people wonder how!

Thank you dear for such a nice gift. This had add beauty to my blog spot!

Treasure I found to cherish for my entire life

2009-03-09T09:17:00.007-05:00

Its an year since I had updated my Blog!!

Last year many things had happened in my life that I really dint get any solid time for updates.

This is my first blog in my new life. I never knew marriage in one's life can really bring in so many changes; that you feel, you are newly born.

It had been a whole month since my marriage and I cant believe I am here in United States with my husband and managing a family.

This is my first visit outside India and the entire journey was brainstorming exercise for me. New places, people, language, attitude, life style..... My hubby was almost explaining me each and every bit. He is a good tutor.

Our trip to US was the start of our new life and togetherness. I wont rate this trip more than 5 for 10 as we had lot of conflicts, opinions clashes even at the start of the journey.

Like all the couples flying abroad [newly wed; with Lady flying first time to US] we were also over packed. To our dismay the lady at the counter was stubborn enough not to allow our overloaded hand baggage. We had had all the important and necessary stuffs in it which we kept on the safe grounds just in case we loose our baggage or get some delay in receiving the same [our hand luggage suitcase was in itself 2kg. Note: our allowed limit was 9 kg].

We did a couple of shuffling from hand to check-in luggage to adjust things. This was what most of them were doing over there. A sign of relief! :) [Human mentality -- happy that you are not the only person to commit mistakes Ha Ha Ha ]

Before I could realize what was happening and warn my husband, all our check-in baggage was gone. With just my hand bag, his shoulder bag, and 2 hand luggage which was over loaded we dint really know what to do with the extra stuffs we had. The lady at the counter just refused to give our boarding pass asking us to reduce our baggage weight.

Experiencing for the first time, I really wanted to shout at her saying "what we do now... do you want us to just throw the stuffs here". Frankly it was not her fault and she was doing her duty. Most of us do know our allowed baggage limit and still I was not sure why we carry more. I felt bad why my husband had not anticipated this when he had traveled many times before.

Luckily, my parents who had come to see me off had their early morning flight to chennai and was there at the terminal. So we quickly gave off most of the stuffs to them and collected our boarding pass.

What I was able to notice was, this was a common event happening for all those who travel. They move in with over sized baggage and if everything is well they could go through else they even pay off the people across the counter to get things done. This thought should definitely change.

Till the completion of our security screening I was not in a shape to even talk to my counterpart freely. I felt it was a bad start for such a great trip [ I meant our life journey too]. But "Mistakes are kick start for learning". Thanks to both of us; we were back to normal soon.

We were bound to Lufthansa flight from Hyderabad to Frankfurt. We boarded the flight around 2.30am. We had few problems in locating space for our hand luggage but rest of the journey was at peace. All I knew in the flight was I slept well which I thought I would never do. The only displeasing event in this journey was when a hostess simply refused to get water for an old lady just because of a stupid reason that the lady had made 2 separate request forcing the hostess to walk twice from her seat to attend the old lady. I also understand that a hostess job was not as easy as we think but being rude at an old lady was not the proper way to out burst her stress. Without hearing her[hostess] part of the story I should not comment on the situation but I did not wish to wade it off my mind without even a mention of the incident.

At Frankfurt..........to be continued!

RATATOUILLE - animation/comedy

2008-01-23T22:52:00.001-06:00

hi dudes

i think i took tooooooo long a gap.. was held up due to personal reasons.. wasnt able to give time for this. so

here i start again fresh with same pace and strength....

i have lot of posts to continue.. so let me start with movie review....

Another movie which i had enjoyed recently the most is "RATATOUILLE" directed by Brad Bird. I knew its too old a review but it was real break to my hectic work schedule...

The story is abt a rat,Remy residing in the French Country side, who is little different [thinks diff] from his counter parts. Unlike other rats who wish to live on garbage/stole food our young hero feels he is entitled to get good/fresh stuffs. His ideas are never heard by his family.

His daily visit to a neighbourhood house for food gives exposure to a cookery show. He gets inspired by the Chef Auguste Gusteau and develops passion for cooking. Due to a mishap he gets seperated from his troupe and ends up in paris only to find that his culinary hero is dead.

His entry into his dreamworld [French Restaurant Gusteau kitchen] paves a way for new experience in his life which he wished to attain. By chance he helps a garbage boy to fix a soup which was spoiled by that boy. This young boy who desperately need to keep his job at the restaurant, despite his lack of cooking abilities, discovers and partners Remy.

Their practise for synchronization and working together at the kitchen, avoiding the then chef [who believes that the boy is not good at cooking], winning over the boy's girl friend and last but not least to make the finest Rataouille all are real fun.

With all this there is also the great contribution of our little hero to prove the young boy as the real heir of the Gusteau and to fight and bring back the control of the restaurant to his hands. The highlight is when all his family members help him for his mission.. The synchronized working of the entire rat family is depicted too good...

The film is a grt feast to people of all ages....

Trek experiences II - Lohagad

2007-01-10T05:17:00.001-06:00

Hope u wld have enjoyed my first experience. Here comes my second.

LOHAGAD:

Near Malavali , a place from pune to lonavala is the spot for various tourist spots. It has two forts lohagad, visapur and caves like bhaje and karla all around it. These forts can easily be tracked from the railway. These are popular forts for trekkers and can be toured in a day from Pune. From malavali station its just 15 minute or 5 kms walk to the base of the lohagad.

Lohagad is 3400 feet high and is very wide spread fort. There are 4 doors to Lohagad from the nearby village -Lohgadwadi. i.e. 'Ganesh Darwaja' , 'Narayan Darwaja' , 'Hanuman Darwaja' and 'Maha Darwaja'. Hanuman darwaja is the oldest.Some sculptures can also be seen on Maha Darwaja. Lohagad is not so spreaded and can be easily seen in few hours.

The famous spot on Lohagad is 'Vinchu Kata' - a range of hills that looks like Capricorn. Amazing view of Pawana Dam is also visible from the back side of Lohagad. The wealth from Surat was brought here under the leadership of Netaji Palkar and kept here for some period.

Our treck to lohagad was done during rainy season. So our entire trip was in rain. Right from the base till we returned back. We were very less count say 11 people. Due to the rain many had dropped out. But I felt a different experience due to the presence of rain though we missed the nature’s beauty around us due to the heavy down pour and also a cloudy weather. When we reached the top there were sprinkles of water coming from the deep valley due to the action of heavy wind over the waterfalls. It was a breath taking experience as for long time we were under the illusion that it was rain and never imagined it could be water from the fall due to the action of breeze.

After trekking down back we went and visited the Bhaje caves which is very near to the loghagad and are of buddist origin. Bhaje is a group of 18 caves. In the 12th cave is the Chaityagriha. Near to the caves is a waterfall about 50feet. We had a great time in the falls. We also tried to go up to the roof of the falls but was able to make only a little as it was steep and slippery. It was more adventurous trek.

Usually there is a way from lohagad to visapur and people can complete both of them in a single day. I dint have to chance to visit visapur due to time constraints. These two forts are historically very crucial and must be visited by trek lovers and history lovers

Trek experiences I - Sinhagad

2006-12-14T03:27:00.000-06:00

Its long time since I wanted to write about this in my blog…..

The most important part of my stay at pune, apart from those night shows and wonderful cooking, I did get a very good chance for a lot of adventures. All the treks, which I took here, are worth mentioning. Every weekend I make myself occupied by going around in pune. My friends here, native of pune, mock at me saying I have seen more places than them.

In and around pune one can find a lot of forts build by our great Shivaji. Though all are ruined a lot, they still act as places for tourist and as a boon for all great trekkers like me [he he he at least I should b telling like this about myself right].

SINHAGAD

My first experience for treck was to Sinhagad fort. It is just 25 kms from pune. From swargate u can take buses or even ricks [usually called 8 seaters] and is just an hour travel. From the base of the fort you can either start treking or can also take a vehicle. There are many private vans which help u in reaching the top of course they charge u. Its 700 meters high and is famous for trip-lovers as well as trekkers.

Inside the fort u have a small water resource called DEV TANK. The water here is very sweet and also cold. Also you have a lot of small tents where you can get kanda bhaji, sweet curd [this is served in small mud pots] and pithle-bhakari [this is a maharastrian dish and tastes good too]. This is very famous among the tourists. Many people come here just to eat these stuffs. They all are made in these tents and served hot. After a good trek you really feel its great relaxation to eat them. All through the trek u can have small shops selling buttermilk – a good companion for the trek.

I loved the entire trip and it being the first experience I was all the more excited. I dint leave any single stone unexplored. Another worth mentioning thing was the climate. Once we reached top the climate changed suddenly and first time I was able to feel myself amidst clouds. Of course we do go by flights and r well above the clouds or wade pass through them. But this was really different watching the clouds at a distance and they just pass through u making u blind folded. Also I got the chance to see the rain [its not required to mention that it was also for the first time]. At a little distance from our hill I could see the rain pouring down in the valley and also their slow moments towards us. It was fascinating to see rain coming towards me. The wait for the rain was the longest ever wait in my life. In a matter of 15-20 minutes the rain was there but its intensity reduced and turned out to be light drizzles…

Contd…….

my sketches....

2006-10-17T08:00:00.000-05:00

summa time passku kaga varanchathunu solamaten.. i love sketching....

பசுங்கனிகள்

2006-10-16T04:13:00.001-05:00

'க்ளுக்' எனச் சிரித்தாள் நெற்கதிர்களின் அரசி!
அவையோரின் மௌனத்தைக் கலைக்க முயன்று
முன்வரிசையில் நின்ற முதிர்கன்னி ஒருத்தி
ஒழுக்கத்தைப்பற்றி விளக்கமாக உரைக்க,
உரலின் இடையென நினைப்பது போல்
பொலிவுடன் தலையசைத்தன மற்ற மணிகள்;

மண்ணின் நடுவே ஊடுறுவிக் கொண்டு
கொள்ளையிட வந்த கொடும்பாவியை நினையாமல்,
நாணிக் குனிந்தன நட்டுவனாரின் செயலிலே!!

செல்லரிக்கப் பட எடுத்துக்கொண்ட நேரமோ
நிமிடத்தினும் குறைவு வினாடியினும் சிறிது!

சின்னப் புழுவின் உற்சாக விருந்தில்
விரைப்பாக வளர்ந்து வளிப்பாக வாழ்ந்து
விண்ணை நோக்காமல் மண்ணில் புதைந்து
பூமித்தாயின் திருவடிகளில் தஞ்சம் புகுந்தன
பசிதீர்க்கும் பசுங்கனிகள் !!!

வீட்டுக்குத் தெரியாமல்

2006-10-05T23:48:00.000-05:00

"கடல் அழகா இல்ல?" என்ற குரல் கேட்டதும் தூக்கத்திலிருந்து விழித்தவள் போல்

"என்ன?" என்றாள் சுமா.

"இல்லை சுமா கடல் அழகா இல்ல?"

"ம் அழகா இருக்கு" என்று சலிப்புடன் சொன்னாள் சுமா.

"என்ன சுமா இப்படி சோகமா இருக்க?"

"இல்ல சுமன் எனக்கு பயமா இருக்கு" என்றாள்.

"என்ன ஆச்சு இப்போ பயப்படறத்துக்கு" என்று சற்று அதட்டலாக கேட்டான்.

"இல்ல சுமன் வீட்ல யாருக்கும் தெரியாம நாம பீச்சுக்கு வந்தது தப்புடா நீ சொன்னாலும் நான் வந்திருக்ககூடாது" என்றாள் பனிவாக.

"உன்ன திருத்தவே முடியாது எப்பப்பாரு பயம்" என்று அலுத்துக்கொண்டான் சுமன்.

"என்ன சுமன் நீயே இப்படி கேட்கற?"

"இல்ல சுமா நானும் தான் வீட்டிற்கு சொல்லாமல் வந்திருக்கேன். வந்த இடத்துல பீச்ச என்ஜாய் பன்றத விட்டுட்டு சும்மா பயந்துக்கிட்டு இருந்தா போர் அடிக்காது" என்று சொல்லிவிட்டு அவளை பார்க்க முடியாமல் தலை குனிந்தான்.

"நீ தைரியசாலி தான் ஒத்துக்கரேன் இது நம்ம வீட்ல தெரிஞ்சா தெரியும் சேதி. சரி இருட்டிகிட்டு வருது வா போகலாம்" என்று சொல்லிக்கொண்டே தங்கள் பிஞ்சு பாதங்கள் மனலில் பதிக்க நடந்தனர் 12 - வயதான் சுமாவும் அவள் அண்ணன் 14 - வயதான சுமனும்

Here goes another

2006-10-04T23:22:00.000-05:00

Hey dont think all my blogs wld be reviews.. I am unable to resist myself from writing this. So here goes another small writeup!!!!

I had got a chance to see the film "DOR" day b4 yesterday.. Actually speaking I selected this film as I had no other choice. None of the english film was attractive and other hindi moives were already watched ones. This narrowed down for us to see this moive. I havent seen any of Nagesh Kukunoor's films [its better to name them as creation rather than simple commercial word]. This one turned out to be the best hindi moive i have ever seen in my life. Now i wish to see Iqbal and Hyderabad blues which r commented to be of the same kind.

Hey pals sure i am not going to disclose the outline of the story and i would request everyone to go and watch the movie [especially in theaters plz] and enjoy its essence urself. So u would think what is write up is going to be about. dont be confused. Just continue.

The lead roles [to be sure these r the 2 characters that the entire story circle around and entire film is filled with them] are Ayesha Takia - as Meera and Gul Panag - as Zeenat. The light side for this quite a bit heavy subject is been given by Shreyas Talpade - Behroopia. This guy has really proved himself and makes us feel the movie we watch is worth it.

The moive has an edge over other counterparts by not having item numbers[this has been a must in all bollywood moives now], marketing of ladies [i feel this done in all films not alone bollywood], unwanted scenes[fights where a hero hits 20 persons, sentiments, dry scences(though the film was taken in rajasthan), tears etc] this wld go on and on and on. In simple words it stands aloof from other commercial films.

A highly respectful film.

காதல்???!!!!

2006-09-29T07:53:00.000-05:00

தன்னிலை தவறி தத்தளிக்கின்றான் தண்ணீரில்
தேவதாசாம்!!!
தேடிய தேவதை தவிக்கவிட்டதால்
தீயிலே தகிக்கவிட்டான் தேகத்தை.

நீர்கோலம்

2006-09-29T07:46:00.001-05:00

வாழ்க்கை ஓர் ஓடம் - அது
நீர்மேல் இட்ட கோலம் - அது
அடையும் கோலம் - கண்டு
மனம் அடையும் கோலம் - என்றென்றும்
மனம் பிரியா சோகம்.

தேவதை

2006-09-29T00:49:00.000-05:00

காற்றை கிழித்துக்கொண்டு சென்றது கார். கதவருகே கண்மூடி அமர்ந்திருந்த காஞ்சனாவை கண்ணாடி வழியே கண்டபோது காதலைவிட காமமே முன் நின்றது.

"காதலுக்கும் காமத்திற்கும் நூலிழை தான் வித்தியாசம் தெரிஞ்சுக்கோ" என்று நண்பனுக்குக் கூறியது நினைவுக்கு வந்தது.

காரின் வேகத்தை மிஞ்சியது மனம். வேகத்தடைக்கு வழி தேடி தவித்தேன். இருள் சூழ்ந்த தனிமையும், குளிர்சேர்ந்த காற்றும், அவள் கவர்ச்சிமிகு கண்களும் என்னை கிரங்க வைத்தது.

'வெள்ளைத் தாமரை தேவதையே என் வேண்டுகோளை கேளடியே' என்று அவள் மடியில் முகம் புதைக்க மனசு ஏங்கியது. ஈரக்காற்றோடு சாரல் சேர்ந்து கொள்ள கார் ஜென்னல்களை ஏற்றிவிட்டாள்.

'சாரல் உள்ளும் அடிக்கிறதே', மூடமுயன்றேன். மழை வலுக்க மரநிழலில் காரை நிறுத்தினேன். உள்ளும் வெளியும் குளிர் அடிக்க குற்ற உணர்ச்சியில் குன்றிப் போனேன்.

அவளை இறுக்க அனைத்து உதடோடு உதடு சேர்த்து உடலோடு உடல் சேர்த்து அவளுக்குள் பின்னிப் பினைந்தேன் கற்பனையில்!
'கற்பனையே இனிக்கிறதே, துணிந்து செய்' என்றது காமுக மனது. கண்கள் மூடி இன்னும் அமர்ந்திருந்தது அந்த கனிச்சோலை.

முன்கதவை திறந்து இறங்கி பின்கதவை திறக்க முயன்றேன். பயம் கவ்விக் கொண்டது. திடம் பெற ஒரு சிகரெட் பற்ற வைத்தேன். மூன்று மாதங்கள் அவளுடன் பழகியும் கடந்த ஓர் மாதமாக அவள் மேல் ஏற்பட்ட தாகத்தின் தாக்கம் என் பெருமூச்சாக புகையோடு சேர்ந்து வந்தது. இது தவறு என்று உணர்த்திய அறிவை ஆசை வெகுவாக வென்றது.

'காமுகா கெடுத்துவிட்டாயே என் வாழ்க்கையை?!' கதறுவாளே அவள். இவைகள் காதுகளில் விழ மறுத்தன.

காரை நோக்கி நடந்து பின்கதவை திறந்து உள்ளே நுழைந்தேன். மெதுவாக அவள் கைகளை பற்றினேன் சில்லிட்டது மெல்ல நகர்த்தி அவள் இடுப்பை பற்றினேன். அவள் இன்னும் கண்கள் மூடியபடியே இருந்தாள். அவள் முகத்தில் ஓடிய மெல்லிய புன்னகை என்னை தைரியம் பெறச் செய்தது. அவள் மேலாடை நீங்கிய அழகு என்னை அள்ளிச் சென்றது. அவளை அனைத்து அவள் மார்பில் முகம் புதைத்தேன் மனதில் பயம் தோன்ற அவளை நேர்கொண்டு பார்த்தேன். எப்பொழுதும் ஏறி இறங்கி அசையும் அவள் மார்புகள் அசைவின்றி இருந்தது. நாடி பிடித்துப் பார்த்தேன் துடிப்பு இல்லை. அவள் கையிலிருந்த காகிதத்தை கண்டேன். பிரித்துப் படித்தேன்.

அன்புள்ள ஷீராம் அவர்களுக்கு,

முதலில் என் நன்றி கலந்த வணக்கத்தை சொல்கிறேன். நீங்கள் என் வாழ்வில் மிகச்சிறந்த திருப்பத்தை ஏற்படுத்திய மனிதர். உங்களை நான் தெய்வமாகவே வணங்கினேன். என் கணவர் மறைவிற்குப்பின், என்னை ஒரு தாசியாகவே அனைவரும் பார்த்தனர். நீங்கள் மட்டும் தான் என் தேகத்தை தாண்டி என் உள்ளத்தை கண்டு அடைக்கலம் தந்தீர்கள். இதனால் தான் உங்களுக்கு எத்துனை அவச் சொற்கள், என் பொருட்டு நீங்கள் பெற்ற அவமானங்களை நான் அறிவேன். ஓர் ஆணும் பொண்ணும் இச்சமுதாயத்தில் சேர்ந்து நண்பர்களாக வாழ இயலாது. அதை ஏற்கும் நல்லுள்ளம் எவருக்கும் இல்லை.

என் கணவர் இறந்து மூன்று மாதங்கள் நீங்கள் என்னை காப்பாற்றி வந்தீர்கள். என்னை தவறான எண்ணத்தில் ஒரு பார்வை கூட பார்த்ததில்லை. இது என்னை வெகுவாக கவர்ந்தது. என் கணவரின் நண்பர் என்ற உணர்வைத் தாண்டி உங்கள் மேல் ஓர் ஈர்ப்பு ஏற்பட்டது. இது சரியா தவறா என்று என்னால் புரிந்து கொள்ள முடியவில்லை. இந்நிலையில் உங்கள் நண்பனிடம் நீங்கள் கூறியது என்னை தலைகுனியச் செய்தது.

'மனசு சுத்தமாய் இருந்தா சிவப்புவிளக்கு பகுதியில் கூட நேர்மையாக வாழலாம். அவ நெருப்புடா' என்று நீங்கள் கூறியதை கேட்டு என் நரம்புகள் துடித்தன. உங்கள் அன்புக்கும் ஆதரவிற்கும் ஏற்றவள் நான் இல்லை. என் மனதில் காலான் முளைத்துவிட்டது.

'ஊராரின் ஏச்சுகளையும் பேச்சுகளையும் பொய்யாக்கலாம்' என்று அடிக்கடி நீங்கள் சொல்லுவீர்கள். உங்கள் நேர்மைக்கு முன்னால் என்னால் நிற்கமுடியவில்லை. என் பொருட்டு பல தியாகங்கள் செய்த உங்களுக்கு நான் செய்யக்கூடியது நீங்கள் களங்கமின்றி வாழ, என் வாழ்வில் விளக்கேற்றி வைத்த உங்கள் நிழலில் என் வாழ்வை முடித்து கொள்கிறேன். நீங்கள் நன்றாக வாழ என் இறைவனை வேண்டுகிறேன்.

என்றும் நன்றியுடன்

காஞ்சனா

மனம் அவமானத்தால் புழுங்கிற்று. என் உண்மை ரூபம் தெரியாமல் இந்த காமுகனை கடவுள் என்று எண்ணி தன்னையே அழித்துக் கொண்டுவிட்டாள். என்னை மனிதனாக மாற்றிவிட்டு மாண்டுவிட்டாள்.

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'ஷீராமச்சந்திர மூர்த்திக்கு அடுத்து எங்க வீட்டுக்காரர்தான். அவர் கூட சீதா தேவியை சந்தேகப்பட்டார். ஆனால் என் கணவர் என்னையும் சந்தேகிக்கமாட்டார்; எனக்கு துரோகமும் நினைக்ககூடமாட்டார்' என்று இன்னும் என் மனைவி மற்றவர்களிடம் கூறியது காதில் விழுந்தது.

'என்னப்பா தூங்கறீங்க வந்து பாடம் சொல்லித்தாங்க' என்று என் மகள் அழைக்க என் கடைமைகளை ஆற்ற எழுந்து சென்றேன், மனதில் என்றும் தேவதையாய் நிலைத்து நின்ற என்னவளுக்கு நன்றி கூறியடியே.

பயம்

2006-09-26T23:18:00.001-05:00

"வா வஸந்த் வா, உள்ளவா",

சுமதி இவ்வாறு அழைப்பாள் என்று அவன் கனவிலும் நினைக்கவில்லை. அவளை அவன் நண்பனுடன் மணக்கோலத்தில் பார்த்த போது கூட இவ்வளவு அதிர்ச்சி அவன் அடையவில்லை.

"என்ன வஸந்த் ஏன் வெளியே நிற்கிறாய்?" என்று அவள் குரல் உள்ளிருந்து கனீரென்று கேட்க அவன் அதிர்ச்சியிலிருந்து விடுபட்டவனாக உள்ளே சென்றான்.

"வந்து ..." வார்த்தைகள் வர மறுத்தன.

"நான் அசோக்கை பார்க்க வந்தேன், அவன் இல்லை?" என்றான்.

உண்மையில் அதுவல்ல காரணம் என்பது அவளுக்குத் தெரியும் என்பது அவனுக்குத் தெரியாது.

"இப்போதான் கிளம்பி வெளியே போனார் இதோ வந்துருவார் நீ உட்கார் என்ன சாப்படரே டீ ஆர் காபி" என்றாள்.

நான் கிளம்பறேன் என்று எழுந்தான். அப்போது தான் அது நடந்தது.

அவள் "வஸந்த்" என்றபடி அவனுடைய மார்ப்பில் சாய்ந்து கொண்டாள். அவள் கண்களில் இருந்து வந்த துளிகள் அவன் மார்பை நனைத்தது. அவள் முகத்தை கைகளில் ஏந்தினான். இந்த அழகு முகத்தை எவ்வளவு வருடங்கள் ரசித்திருப்பான்!

"இந்தா காபி" என்ற அவள் குரல் அவனை எழுப்பியது.

"சீ கனவா?" என்று அவன் கூறியது அவள் காதுகளில் விழுந்தது.

"நானே உன்கிட்ட பேசனும்னு இருந்தேன். நீ என்னை பார்க்கத்தான் வந்தேன்னு எனக்குத் தெரியும். நான் என் பழைய வாழ்க்கையை மறந்துட்டு ஒரு புது வாழ்க்கையை ஆரம்பிச்சுட்டு இருக்கேன். அதனால் இனிமே நீ இங்கே வராதே. என்ன மறந்திடு, மன்னிச்சிடு"

என்று அவள் சொல்லும் பொழுதே அதற்குமேல் வார்த்தை வர இயலாமல் அழுதே விட்டாள்.

அவளுக்கு என்ன ஆறுதல் கூறுவது என்று தெரியாத பொழுதும் தான் நினைத்து வந்ததையே அவள் கூறியதை கேட்டு அவனுக்கு மெய் சிலிர்த்தது.

தான் இனிமேலும் அங்கு போகத்தேவையில்லை என்று நினைத்துக்கொண்டே, தன் தந்தையை எதிர்க்கத் துணிவில்லாமல், தன் தங்கையின் திருமணத்தை ஆதரிக்க முடியாத நிலையில் அவளின் தற்போதைய வாழ்க்கைக் காணக்கூட, யாருக்கும் தெரியாமல் வந்த வஸந்த், அவள் நன்றாக இருந்தாலே போதும், என்று ஆண்டவனை வேண்டிக்கொண்டே, அவளின் துனிவு இவனுக்கு வருமா?! என்று வியந்தவாறு தலை குனிந்து யாரும் பார்த்துவிடுவாரோ என்ற பயத்துடன் சென்றான்.

இயலாமை

2006-09-23T07:15:00.000-05:00

அந்த இளைஞன் சதா அவள் மேல் இடித்துக் கொண்டே இருந்தான். பேருந்து என்றாலே இப்படித்தான். அதுவும் பல்லவன் கழகம் என்றால் சொல்லவா வேண்டும். எனக்குப் பற்றிக் கொண்டு வந்தது.

இப்படி நடப்பதும் ஒரு பிழைப்பா என்று எண்ணிக் கொண்டேன். பேருந்தில் பயணம் செல்லும் எந்த பெண்ணுக்கும் இந்த நிலைமை தான் என்பது எனக்கு நன்கு தெரியும்.

'என்ன செய்வது பொறுத்துத்தான் போக வேண்டும் பெண்ணாகப் பிறந்துவிட்டோமே!' என்ற எண்ணம் அனைவருக்கும் உண்டு.

நான் மட்டும் என்ன விதிவிலக்கா? அப்படித்தான் நானும் கண்டு கொள்ளாமல் இருந்திருப்பேன் ஆனால் அன்று மனம் கேட்கவில்லை

'இன்னும் எவ்வளவு நாள்தான் இப்படிக் கழிப்பது? பெண்கள் என்றாலே இதுதான் கதியா?? ' கொதித்தது என் மனம் எழுந்து நாலு அரை கொடுத்து விடலாமோ என நினைத்தேன்.

பின் விளைவுகளை பற்றிய பயம் எனக்கு இருந்தாலும் அன்றுமட்டும் என்னால் சும்மா இருக்கமுடியவில்லை எழுந்தேன்.

"ஏன்யா நீங்க அக்கா தங்கச்சியோட பொறக்கல! இப்படி படுத்தறீங்க அந்த பொண்ண. கேட்க ஆளில்லை என்ற திமிரா?" என்றேன் சற்று அதட்டலாக.

உடனே அவனிடமிருந்து வந்த பதில் என்னை அதிர்த்தது. அவை
"ஏன் நாத்தியப்பார்க்க இவ்வளவு இஷ்டமா? சொன்னா கூட்டியாந்திருப்பேனே".

இது என் ஆழ்மனதை பாதித்தது. நான் வெலவெலத்துப் போனேன். பேருந்தே என்னைப் பார்த்தது நான் அமைதியானேன்.

நிருத்தம் வந்ததும் நானும் அந்த பெண்ணும் இறங்கினோம். அந்தப் பெண் என்னிடம் வந்து

"ஏம்மா அவனுங்ககிட்ட போய் வாய்க்கொடுக்கரீங்க அதுங்க எல்லாம் திருந்தா ஜென்மங்க. விட்டுத்தள்ளுங்க இப்படி உரசிப்பார்ப்பதில் என்ன பெரிய சந்தோஷமோ!! செவிடன் காதுல சங்கூதி என்ன பயன். இப்ப சொல்லறேன், நானும் ஒரு போலீஸ்காரன் பொண்ணுதான் இவனுங்கள என்ன செய்ய முடியும் எல்லாம் விதி. எப்படியும் நீங்க செய்த ஹெல்பிற்கு ரொம்ப நன்றிங்க. இனிமே இவனுங்ககிட்ட ஜாக்கிரதையா இருங்க. நான் வரேன்" என்று அவன் சொல்லிப்போனதை திடுக்கிட்டபடி பார்த்துக் கொண்டிருந்தேன் நான்.

கனவின் இனிமை

2006-09-23T06:23:00.000-05:00

காலை மனி 10. ஆண்டவனை வேண்டிக்கொண்டு கொடுக்கப்பட்ட வினாத்தாளை பிரித்தேன்.

"Thank God" கிட்டத்தட்ட கத்தியே விட்டேன்.

மேற்பார்வை பார்க்க வந்தவர் "என்ன?" என்றார்.

அனைவருடைய கண்களும் என் மேல். சற்று வெட்கப்பட்டுக்கொண்டே

"ஒன்னுமில்லை!" என்றேன்.

பத்து மதிப்பெண்கள் தரப்படும் 10 கேள்விகளுக்கு வேகமாக பதில் எழுத ஆரம்பித்தேன். அரை மணி நேரம். அட ! என்னால் நம்ப முடியவில்லை. பின் சரசரவென அனைத்தையும் முடித்துவிட்டு மணியை பார்த்தேன். இன்னும் அரை மணி நேரம் இருந்தது.

நிதானமாக தாளை சரி பார்த்தேன் okay என்று தோன்றியது. தாளை கொடுத்துவிட்டுக் கிளம்பினேன். கீழே என் நண்பர்கள். ஒரு மதிப்பெண் விடைகளை சரி பார்த்தேன். அனைத்து விடைகளும் சரியாக எழுதியிருந்தேன். அட என்ன இது?

'நீ தேரப்போவதில்லை என்ற சொற்கள் பல என் காதுகளில் விழுந்தது தேர்வுக்கு முன்னால்! என்னால் கூட எழுத முடியும் நிச்சியமாக முடியும், இதை நான் நிரூபனம் செய்து இருக்கிறேன்'.

"ராகுல்! டேய் ராகுல்! எழுந்திருடா எருமைமாடு" அப்பாவின் குரல் பள்ளியில்? சற்று நேரத்தில் நீர் துளிகள் என் முகத்தில்; துடைத்துக் கொண்டு எழுந்தேன்.

'என்ன ஒரு கனவு?' என்று நினைத்தேன்.

கனவைப் பற்றி வெளியே சொல்ல முடியவில்லை. சொன்னால் இன்னும் சேர்த்து வைத்து திட்டுவார்கள் என்று அலுத்துக் கொண்டே குளியலறை நோக்கி தளிர் நடை போட்ட படி சென்றான் மார்ச் தேராமல் அக்டோபரிலாவது பாஸ் செய்ய வேண்டும் என்ற உறுதி கொண்டு வேதனையின் விலும்பில் நின்றிருந்த ராகுல்....

memories that wld last forever

2006-09-23T02:16:00.000-05:00

Yest had been one of my best day in life...

Though u ppl wld not be surprised i wld have 3 pairs of eyebrows raised seeing this.....
yest my roomie left us and went back home... so it shld have been a sad day right.. but to be true it really turned out to be a grt day for me...

wait dont start to curse me..i meant it gave me a chance to know abt myself and how much she had occupied my life..... rather to say all our life..[we were close to tears when she departed in the airport ofcourse i had my icecream still in hand which we all had not actually enjoyed]

she had been with me in school. but the intimacy we hadnt got in those 2 yrs, was got in this 4 months. She had been our official jester.. every word she utters would turn out to be a joke...I cant forget those momements when my another roomie wld try to swallow water with grt difficutly as she wld not be able to control her laughter... This had been our usually way to tease her. whenever she drinks water i wld ask my roomie to spk so that the other wont be able to drink water properly...

Every second had been a grt event for us... we enjoyed every moment of life. those late nightes chats [we indeed got grt opposition from our association for being a cause of noise pollution], songs that we used to sing together during cooking the night shows [dont panic we used to sing good only.. all ilayaraja's beats as we both like them a lot], the back to back show of cars and sentinal [ that surprisingly turned out to be a noon show], the new dishes that we make [all the old dishes only but with new procedure as we dont know the exact procedure], the weekends we shared,....... this wld go on and on and on..

Above all, our hearts were filled with tears by the surprise that she had left for us... i had replayed a crystal maze/treasure hunt to get the gifts that she had left in our home[though very small] with clues in the cards... i dint know when she cld have done them.. The ganesh idol she had kept as a gift was very cute....

i miss her rather we miss her!!!!! we wld definitely miss her a lot....

Just a thought

2006-09-22T03:26:00.000-05:00

This blog of mine is not meant dedicated for tamil . So here comes my new addup.....

I am not that good at english write ups. This is my first try.... everything shld have a start and here goes mine now...

I am very scheduled person [dont ask ppl who had waited 4 me for hours as they wld give a different pic of mine] I mean i like to do things at time [rather to say i am been practised to do so] In my home my dad is very perfect in these things.. he likes to get up early and sleep early.. in our home the lights shld be off by max 10pm. I know many wld feel this quite early but we had no choice.. I am the only exception to this rule as during exam i used to stay late [that to max 12 only allowed]. Because of this I was even forced not to see my favourite serial [Manaivi at 10pm in SUN Tv]. Never mind let me get to the topic ...

My life at pune had changed many things.. And one important event is my eating and sleeping time. Our time pass is generally watching movies that too nightshows only... I am not a person who goes for theaters and this transition is quite a great leap for me.

The total number of night shows i have seen in this 6 months stay is more than the number of films i had seen in theater in my entire life.. Its just dozen or so but still this count is more. Each movie was a new experience for me... Of all the movies i loved "CARS" , "Over the headge", "Lage Rago Munnabai", "SUPERMAN RETURS".

Its worth going to cars. It is an animated film by "PIXAR" .. Their last release "FINDING NEMO" was my favourite.. I had watched that moive in theater for 4 times. 3 times in the Studio 5 screen of Sathyam complex.. And 4th in my CD player.. 'Cars' is another masterpiece of them. I loved it a lot. Here goes its review...

This is about a car - 'Lightning Mc Queeen' [our hero] who participate in a race for Piston cup winning which had been his life time ambition. The race ends with 3 cars coming first. So the judges decide to keep the final run in California after 5 days. Our hero is little arrogant and crooky...The stroy unwinds with our little hero realizing the fact that life is about playing and not winning and also living and working together is grt fun rather than stand alone.

While his journey to his race spot which happened to be at other end, he looses track and goes to a town Radaitor Springs in Route 66 [which got unused due to the new routes constructed]. Here he comes across the grand master "Doc Hudson" who had been the champion for many yrs of the Piston cup. Also the "Master" a rusty truck wins over the love of our hero and helps him in his country service.

Even in this film they havent forgotten the romance. So here we go to introduce our heroine "Sally". She is cute car and her blue color makes her look gorgeous. In his race Doc himself comes as his trainer and finally though our little hero doesnt win the cup he wins the heart of entire world by helping a fellow car who got stuck in between the race to finish his last lap......

The screen in full of cars.. Even the bees and flies r in the shape of cars. The picturization is excellent. When Sally goes past the waterfall and our hero looks it from distance, the love that is shown in both of their eyes is worth mentioning. [This scene is enjoyed the most]. Also the emotions of all the cars when they came to know that Mc Queen is going to leave them , the silly games that Master and Mc Queen plays by waking up all the tracktors , Master driving in reverse gears, the most famous quote "To turn right u have to turn left" by Doc are grt....

Its worth a movie and i enjoyed it a lot though it dint beat my "Finding Nemo......"

மெழுகுவர்த்தி

2006-09-21T08:13:00.000-05:00

உயிர் கொடுத்து உருகியுருகி படிக்க வைக்கின்றேன்
என்றாவதொருநாள்
மற்றவருக்கு உயிர் கொடுப்பாய் என்று

காற்று கண்ணத்தில் அறைந்ததும்
அழுவதை நிறுத்தியது மெழுகுவர்த்தி!!!!

இதுவே கவிதையோ !!!

2006-09-19T08:40:00.000-05:00

வார்த்தைகளை கோர்த்தால் கவிதை
வெறும் எழுத்துக்களைக் கோர்த்தேன் கவிதையானது!!
அடி என்ன இது உன் பெயர் எழுதிய காகிதம் கூட மணக்கிறது.

மரத்துண்டு [log of wood]

2006-09-08T06:58:00.000-05:00

ஆழ்கடலில் தத்தளித்துக் கொண்டிருந்தான்
கைப்பிடித்தேன்
கரைசேர்பதற்கு !! -
இன்று
அலைகின்றேன் விழிகளில் நீர்துளிகளோடு
என்னை கரைசேர்க்கும் நல் இதயத்தை
காண்பதற்கு

இது தான் காதலோ!?!?

2006-09-08T01:19:00.000-05:00

வெய்யிலில் உறைகிறேன்
பனியில் வேர்கிறேன்
ஏன் இந்த மாற்றம் என்றேன்
நன்பனிடம்
சீதோஷண நிலை மாற்றமோ?
என்றான்
ஆம் ஆனால் வெளியே அல்ல உள்ளே!!!!!

திருந்தாத நெஞ்சம்

2006-08-31T02:45:00.000-05:00

திருந்திவிடுவாயென நான் நினைத்தேன்
திருத்திவிடலாமென நீ இருந்தாய்
திரும்பிப் பார்க்கும் முன்
தினங்கள் பலவும் ஓட
தினசரியில் உன் முகம் - நீர்
திவலைகளில் என் மனம்.